don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
