Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Randomize
