ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Congratulations! We have a period
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