she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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