there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
