This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Randomize
