btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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