Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I think i peed on brittanys purse
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
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