She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
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