Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize