Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
