Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Randomize
