Christians are straight up FREAKS
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
At least life still wants to fuck me.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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