She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
