so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
