I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
