I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
then he tried to convert me to islam
You left your underwear on the fireplace
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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