There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
