redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Randomize
