well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
they're like a gay fantastic four
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize