arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
