whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Randomize
