what if every blade of grass was a penis?
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
