Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Its about making memories worth repressing
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Randomize
