bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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