Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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