His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
