So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
