I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
