Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
