i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
