Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
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