So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Randomize
