Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
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