i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Randomize
