Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize