we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
whose ass print is on the piano?
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
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