Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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