your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Randomize
