I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
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