this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
