I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Randomize
