Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Randomize
