Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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