Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
