i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Randomize
