doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
