As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize