i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
she woke up with a sticky ear
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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