like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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